[In another chapter of “Sorry About Your Crappy Childhood” we meet the real Alice of Alice in Wonderland.]
“It was a sunny, languid fourth of July in 1862, Charles Dobson [the real name of Lewis Carroll] took Alice Liddell and her two sisters on a boat ride on the river Thames. As he had often done before, Dobson began to tell a story: ‘I distinctly remember how in desperate attempt to strike out some new line of fairy lore, I sent our heroine straight down a rabbit hole without the least idea of what was to happen afterwards.’ That moment of magic on the river created a world that would change the landscape of childhood...”
“Next to the Bible and Shakespeare, Alice in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass are the most quoted books in the English language... After Alice said, ‘Mr. Dobson, would you write that story down for me?’ Clearly a request he could not refuse. He spent the following day writing all the chapter headings out. Very carefully noting all the main features of the book. But what kind of book was Carroll writing? Are Alice’s adventures a joyful celebration of the absurd? Or the haunting dreams of a tormented author? Alice dodges easy answers.” -- Great Books, The Learning Channel
“One time after our rowing-trip, mother got upset at a letter he had sent me and tore it up. I was forbidden by her to see Lewis for a while after that. Father cannot seem to decide whether he thinks I should be able to see Lewis, but frankly, I think I will soon be too old for his nonsense.” -- Alice Liddell’s diary 15 December 1865
“Mr. Dodgson called this afternoon on business with father. I was surprised to see him in our house since he has not been invited in quite a while. It was good to see him, but he seemed rather unhappy and more business-like than usual. It almost seems as though he regards me differently now that I am an adult. I do not feel that he sees me differently necessarily because we have grown apart (or been forced apart by mother and father), rather I see him as someone who is incompetent when it comes to dealing with adults.” -- Alice Liddell’s diary 24 April 1873
I’m not convinced that the diary of Alice Liddell is real. It may be fan fiction like the Hitler, Jack the Ripper or Howard Hughes diaries. But they are fun to read. Much has been made of what really happened between Carroll and the real Alice that isn’t fit for a children’s book... particularly a pop up one. It is all just speculation that says more about the speculator than Lewis Carroll. But than again, Lewis always loved nonsense.
The most plausible answer? Alice's mother simply felt it was inappropriate for a 11-year-old girl to be with a middle-aged man -- a middle-aged man with the mind of an adult but the heart of a child. Alice grew up, Carroll didn't. It is that simple.
To be creative, an artist needs to see the world with the wonder of a child. Carroll did. Wonderland is the comic tragedy of Alice becoming an adult -- Carroll celebrated her growth even as he lost his playmate. He knew it was inevitable and bitter sweet. Did he love Alice? Stupid question: "Still she haunts me..." Carroll's farewell to Alice and Wonderland in Through the Looking Glass:
A boat beneath a sunny sky,
Lingering onward dreamily
In an evening of July--
Children three that nestle near,
Eager eye and willing ear,
Pleased a simple tale to hear--
Long has paled that sunny sky:
Echoes fade and memories die.
Autumn frosts have slain July.
Still she haunts me, phantomwise,
Alice moving under skies
Never seen by waking eyes.
Children yet, the tale to hear,
Eager eye and willing ear,
Lovingly shall nestle near
In a Wonderland they lie,
Dreaming as the days go by,
Dreaming as the summers die:
Ever drifting down the stream--
Lingering in the golden gleam--
Life, what is it but a dream?
Alice Liddell’s diary: https://webspace.utexas.edu/bantweil/E375L/Alice_Liddel%27s_Diaries_P1B.htm
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